I will complete my Peace Corps application.
I went to a Peace Corps info session in DC a couple days ago to help me decide if this is really something I want to do. Stories were told, the application process was explained, and questions were answered. I was quite comforted when I learned that after waiting several months after handing in their application, some people who were invited to go to a particular country actually turn down the offer because they got the job they wanted, or got accepted to grad school. I liked that though I applied, I still have other options. I can still strive to do other things, and if things work out a different way, then I can just back out. Then again, I was truly inspired by the stories and videos I saw during the presentation. I was jealous and the same time happy for the relationships people made, the language they learned, the skills they attained, and the new perspectives they have. I want that. I not only want to have an affect on people’s lives, but I want them to have an affect on me.
It’s going to be difficult though, no doubt. People often mentioned living with lack of electricity, lack of plumbing, getting stomach viruses. But hey, what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger right? For a while, I was about 50/50 in terms of deciding if I should fill out an application. Obviously my past post about my affirmation to “change the world” is towards the Pros on my Pros and Cons list. However, being away from friends, family, and the boyfriend is going to be extremely difficult. I’m trying not to be selfish here, but I can’t help but think about the home-cooked meals I will be missing, the hugs from loved ones I won’t be getting, the bed I won’t be sleeping in, the family get-togethers I won’t be at, and so many other things. But even though I am going to feel alone in more ways than one, I will build another family at the end of it.
After the info session, I spoke to my dad as I was walking to the Dupont Circle metro and told him for the first time that I was applying for the Peace Corps. He didn’t know I was interested so he asked me if this was something I really wanted to do. I told him yes and gave him my reasons. And what he told me in response made me tear up for a second while I was still on the phone. He said, “I’m really proud of you anak for making that decision. Just be safe, ok?” I was in shock, and I jokingly said, “Dad, I didn’t even finish filling out the application yet! I’m not going anywhere!” But he just replied, “but still, I am proud that I can tell people my daughter is interested in doing the Peace Corps”.
Ever since the divorce, I only talk to my dad about once a week now, and eat dinner with him once in awhile. I was really glad I had that conversation with him.
